-=-
Menu
Tournaments
Profile
Poll
Latest videos
Latest comments
Latest matches
flag -t3> [08:13] CXflag
flag CX [20:00] [CDF]flag
flag [GpW] [07:04] [CDF]flag
flag [GpW] [10:07] [CDF]flag
flag [CDF] [03:07] [GpW]flag
flag [GpW] [08:04] [CDF]flag
flag [CDF] [04:09] [GpW]flag
flag [CDF] [03:06] [GpW]flag
flag [CDF] [04:06] [GpW]flag
flag -t3> [08:02] Cxnflag
Latest forum posts
By: [GpW]Urbs, in: incorrect dates for clanwars » JJ2 related 2020-01-02 21:56
kimo back yo :kali:
By: KiMO, in: incorrect dates for clanwars » JJ2 related 2020-01-02 16:10
i am the present
By: Loon, in: incorrect dates for clanwars » JJ2 related 2019-12-31 10:05
hi kimo was that the present?
By: KiMO, in: incorrect dates for clanwars » JJ2 related 2019-12-31 03:09
wow
By: ThunDer, in: incorrect dates for clanwars » JJ2 related 2019-12-25 14:03
which presento m8 i-)
By: King, in: incorrect dates for clanwars » JJ2 related 2019-12-25 00:14
I like your xmas presento kristo!
By: Krzysiek, in: incorrect dates for clanwars » JJ2 related 2019-12-25 00:10
merry xmas
By: ThunDer, in: incorrect dates for clanwars » JJ2 related 2019-12-24 11:55
MS our man :*
By: MasterSven, in: incorrect dates for clanwars » JJ2 related 2019-12-24 08:33
You guys are basically making a fool out of yourse...
By: Naps, in: incorrect dates for clanwars » JJ2 related 2019-12-23 18:11
I partially understand your point but the people w...
By: Artegor, in: incorrect dates for clanwars » JJ2 related 2019-12-23 17:38
Of course it does not protect you, you kinda missi...
By: Naps, in: incorrect dates for clanwars » JJ2 related 2019-12-23 17:28
VPN does not protect you from DDOS attacks at all,...
By: Artegor, in: incorrect dates for clanwars » JJ2 related 2019-12-23 17:15
Naps, there's something called VPN. You can find f...
By: Pariah, in: incorrect dates for clanwars » JJ2 related 2019-12-22 07:01
you are right, i have nothing to contirbute. war, ...
By: Naps, in: incorrect dates for clanwars » JJ2 related 2019-12-22 04:00
It would have been better if you rather contribute...
By: i:m, in: incorrect dates for clanwars » JJ2 related 2019-12-20 01:33
ok but why did jety leave gpw :???:
By: Pariah, in: incorrect dates for clanwars » JJ2 related 2019-12-19 23:45
recently people have put the incorrect dates for c...
By: Pariah, in: A new balance proposal » Improving rules 2019-12-19 22:42
@rag: spaz meelee move is not so special jazz and ...
By: Abdoun, in: Funniest moments! » Forum games 2019-12-18 00:55
1-/: i dont forfeit i just dont wanna play :S
By: Ragnarok, in: A new balance proposal » Improving rules 2019-11-20 19:49
Just thought I'd share my two pieces on what copte...
By: Ragnarok, in: Contest results! [JJnet Level Contest Season 13] » JJ2 related 2019-11-02 04:17
In alphabetical order: 1. Byzantine Blues by...
By: Vivando, in: Contest results! [JJnet Level Contest Season 13] » JJ2 related 2019-11-01 20:11
Feedback! from SJ: FTL Starship: + Fairly ba...
By: Vivando, in: Contest results! [JJnet Level Contest Season 13] » JJ2 related 2019-11-01 20:09
Dear all, the level contest results are finally he...
By: Treylina, in: A new balance proposal » Improving rules 2019-10-22 01:00
Here it is, a long overdue update. Better late tha...
By: Toni, in: What JJ2 level title best describes your sex life? » JJ2 related 2019-09-08 01:11
Underrated Paradise
By: DanZeal, in: Funniest moments! » Forum games 2019-09-07 20:02
[20:00:05] DannyZ[CDF]: Jag var i Finland tidigare...
By: SirEmentaler, in: What JJ2 level title best describes your sex life? » JJ2 related 2019-08-21 20:45
I just wanted to say this topic was inspired by a ...
By: Slaz, in: What JJ2 level title best describes your sex life? » JJ2 related 2019-08-20 14:13
ELEKTREK PYRAMID :dizzy:
By: PurpleJazz, in: What JJ2 level title best describes your sex life? » JJ2 related 2019-08-19 06:44
15 Second Rush
By: Laro24, in: What JJ2 level title best describes your sex life? » JJ2 related 2019-08-10 19:15
Nuclear Afterblast :whistling:
By: Plumbe, in: What JJ2 level title best describes your sex life? » JJ2 related 2019-08-10 16:50
Wicked Wood :flex:
By: [GpW]Urbs, in: What JJ2 level title best describes your sex life? » JJ2 related 2019-08-10 15:59
Jungles Edge :D
By: ThunDer, in: What JJ2 level title best describes your sex life? » JJ2 related 2019-08-10 02:46
Facing Worlds
By: Ragnarok, in: What JJ2 level title best describes your sex life? » JJ2 related 2019-08-09 18:30
Drought :whisper:
By: MasterSven, in: What JJ2 level title best describes your sex life? » JJ2 related 2019-08-09 15:33
There can be only one: Magma P*nis Despair. :carr...
More...!

JJnet's forum

«Latest posts» «Latest threads» «Search» «User CP»

     Question for Jelly Jam | [q] 2019-07-10 23:31
Ragnarok
CXavatar
JJnet user

Posts: 156
24
I was thinking...

If coffee is made of beans, does that make it a vegetable, and therefore one of my five a day?

Does the government want me to have 5 coffees a day?
Replies
Vivando
-t3>
avatar
JJnet admin
Posts: 119
27
#1 | [q]2019-07-11 10:09
I volunteer as Jelly Jam's assistant regarding this and answer on his behalf that you can get your 'five' by having Unconventional Coffee 5 times a day as well. Any size will do, 1v1, 2v2, etc.
(This post has been helpful to 1 of the forumers.)
Jelly Jam
[GpW]
avatar
JJnet user
Posts: 334
10
#2 | [q]2019-07-11 22:49
i like your way of thinking ragnarok my dear, i'm going to make this as short as possible











coffe beans, being beans, gets us to a shocking conclusion that we are indeed talking about beans









beans are vegetables









and you know what else is a vegetable








watermelon











watermelon has the word water in it










it obviously means water is a vegetable









and since watermelons and beans are related because they are both vegetables


























= beans are water















= coffee is water













Don't believe me? HERE: I have a perfectly valid .j2ass code to prove it

Code:
if jjOBJ(OBJECT :: BEANS) <=> OBJECT :: WATERLEVEL;
then
void onCoffee()
  jjCoffeePresets = WATER;
return false;
END


























a-HA! you just got ultra nae naed













the syntax of that code is intentionally incorrect and i absolutely know how the language works.












it's supposed to symbolize how coffee beans are not water, thus the theory that coffee = vegetable is incorrect, just like this code is incorrect!!



























that was my final answer all along
















you dumbdumb
















hihihi
jelly out
Jelly Jam
[GpW]
avatar
JJnet user
Posts: 334
10
#3 | [q]2019-07-11 23:04
Also why would lizard people want you to take five coffees a day?
Yeah, that's right. I may or may not be a guy that believes that people who run countries are evil lizard people who control the world.

But, for legal reasons, that's a joke.
Ragnarok
CX
avatar
JJnet user
Posts: 156
24
#4 | [q]2019-07-12 00:04
I watched a Youtube video where the queen of britain opened her mouth...
Except it opened sideways...
Definite lizard-person
SAMI
avatar

JJnet user
Posts: 14
0
#5 | [q]2019-07-12 12:53
Lizard people are real.
They feast on humans and leave no trace so that no one believes the existence of lizards.

All hail Mark Zuckerberg, the Cyborg Lizard lord.
SirEmentaler
avatar

Moderator
Posts: 126
44
#6 | [q]2019-07-13 00:34
I've done extensive research on this topic and I'd like to inform you of my conclusions.

Coffee beans are not vegetables. They are, in fact, nuts.

Coffee is therefore nut milk.
(This post has been helpful to 1 of the forumers.)
Jelly Jam
[GpW]
avatar
JJnet user
Posts: 334
10
#7 | [q]2019-07-13 00:57
teeheehee
you said nut milk
Ragnarok
CX
avatar
JJnet user
Posts: 156
24
#8 | [q]2019-07-15 09:18
from where did you cite such information?
SirEmentaler
avatar

Moderator
Posts: 126
44
#9 | [q]2019-07-16 04:28
Like I said, these are "conclusions" rather than direct results of research, but I believe I can make a solid case for my statement.

First off, it's important to understand the categories we're talking about. When speaking of "five a day", we mean what is typically referred to as "five portions of fruit and vegetables". The issue with this wording is that whereas "fruit" has a very well-defined, strict botanical meaning, "vegetable" is in fact a purely culinary/cultural category that applies to a wide range of edible parts of plants. This distinction introduces some confusion; many people seem to believe that because e.g. tomato is a fruit, it is not a vegetable - in reality, tomato is both a fruit in botanical terms and a vegetable in culinary terms (which, again, are the only terms the word "vegetable" is meaningful in).

The word "fruit", however, is ambiguous. Like I mentioned, it has a botanical meaning, but it is also occasionally used as a culinary term to describe sweet parts of plants, commonly used in desserts. In this sense, tomato and cucumber are typically not considered fruit, but rhubarb is, despite the edible part of rhubarb being its leaf stalk. When referring to "fruit and vegetables", I would thus argue that we mean fruit in the culinary sense, which includes rhubarb. Otherwise it would seem inconsistent to mix a scientific term with a cultural one.

Now that that's clear, it's important to mention that there are several other categories of plant parts used in cuisine, and among them are nuts. This is another term that has both a botanical and a culinary meaning, but it makes sense to keep using the latter for the sake of consistency. In particular, many types of culinary nuts are actually seeds of their corresponding plants rather than botanical nuts; this includes almonds, Brazil nuts, cashews, peanuts, walnuts, and pistachios. Wikipedia loosely defines nut in this sense as "any large, oily kernel found within a shell and used in food".

As for coffee beans, biologically they are seeds of the coffee plant. They are "large" in the same sense as peanuts or pistachios are, and undoubtedly oily and used in food. The only troublesome part may be that they are not normally found inside a hard shell, to my knowledge. Personally, I consider this a technicality - they are still found inside a plant part, it's just that this surrounding part is soft rather than hard. Happens to the best of us. And if you take into account the travesty that is the coconut, you may be more considerate towards inclusion of the coffee bean (to its credit, even in the culinary sense, Wikipedia refuses to acknowledge coconuts as nuts, but it can't hide the fact it's still right there in the name). Intuitively, coffee beans also possess more traits we associate with nuts than fruit or vegetables.

The only type of beverage I'm aware of that is made from nuts is alternative milk. Most common is almond milk, but other types of nuts are also used to produce vegan milk, such as cashews, hazelnuts, pistachios, or macadamia nuts. It follows that coffee, a beverage made from nuts, is thus a type of nut milk.
Ragnarok
CX
avatar
JJnet user
Posts: 156
24
#10 | [q]2019-07-18 19:22
I feel that there are several conclusions I have come to from the outcome of this lengthy discussion:

• I should not be supporting Wikipedia with a £2 a year donation. Refusal to acknowledge a coconut as a nut is simply heinous as an act.
• Hyperion is my favourite fruit in JJ2 :3.
• This conversation, whilst insightful, has almost overlooked the key talking point raised by Jelleth Jammus, about Lizard People.
• Lizard people are possibly producing coffee from milking their nuts, and then convincing us that it’s ‘trendy’ and ‘cool’, and making a salary from us drinking their (un)natural produce.

ThunDer
CX
avatar
JJnet user
Posts: 30
2
#11 | [q]2019-07-20 02:31
I am utterly in agreement with all facts above.
(This post has been helpful to 1 of the forumers.)
Jelly Jam
[GpW]
avatar
JJnet user
Posts: 334
10
#12 | [q]2019-07-22 01:56
utter sounds like udder
Mercuryquake
rabbit

JJnet user
Posts: 3
0
#13 | [q]2019-08-01 19:24
Coffee is a drug, actually. Therefore it shouldn't be considered a food at all, rather more like a medicine. However, if you ate whole coffee beans, I guess that as a legume, it would have some vegetabities as well. That being said, beans are technically a type of fruit actually, although, fruit is also a type of vegetable.


"If it's in the game, then it's in the game"